ONIONS AND CHRISTMAS TREES

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ONIONS AND CHRISTMAS TREES
>
> A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, "Dad, how many
> kinds of boobs are there?"
>
> The father, surprised, answers , "Well, son, there are three kinds of
> breasts. In her 20's, a woman's breasts are like melons, round and firm.
> In her 30's to 40's, they are like pears, still nice but hanging
> a bit. After 50, they are like onions.
>
> "Onions?"
>
> "Yes, you see them and they make you cry."
>
> This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter said, "Mom, how many
> kinds of 'willies' are there?"
>
> The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, "Well dear, a man goes through
> three phases. In his 20's, his willie is like an oak tree, mighty and
> hard. In his 30's and 40's, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable.
> After his 50's, it is like a Christmas tree".
>
> "A Christmas tree?"
>
> "Yes, dear - dead from the roots up and the balls are just for decoration."