Warning Signs of a Bad Boat Captain

[macojoe]

Warning Signs of a Bad Boat Captain
From Jim Shepard,
Your Guide to Powerboating.
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Ten Ways to Aggravate Other Boaters
As a guy who’s been around the water longer than he likes to admit, both as a boater and as a marina owner, I've formulated a list of things to look for when observing the operator of any boat in my area. The following are ten (10) danger signs that will give you a good idea of those skippers from which you'll need to steer clear. This list is in no particular order and might be considered, by some, to just be grumblings from a crusty old seadog. So, read them over and let me know what your own pet peeves are.

1. Look out when a boat with twin engines is within 100 yards of the dock and the captain is still trying to steer the boat with the wheel instead of his engines. Prepare for a "loud" landing.

2. If the skipper is motoring across the harbor with fenders and lines dangling in the water, it's a very good indicator that the skipper is NOT "on the ball."

3. Here's one that may surprise some of you. Flying your Ensign (either country of origin or yacht ensign) on the bow staff is totally incorrect and an act of disrespect for your country's flag. The only place to properly fly the ensign is at or near the stern of your boat. I'm convinced that most skippers who fly the ensign on the bow pole simply don't know any better. Which makes my point: An ensign on the bow pole equals land lubber.

4. Beware of the skipper who doesn't keep his head on a swivel. If he or she is steering, facing straight ahead without looking astern, watch out. That skipper has no idea of what is behind him and is liable to make a sudden maneuver without any warning.

If you are overtaking this type of skipper, then I consider it mandatory to use proper horn signals.

One short blast means you intend to pass him on your port (left) side.

Two short horn blasts, indicate that you intend to pass him on your starboard (right) side.

These horn signals should get his attention.

5. The jerk (I usually have some other pet names for him) who approaches a marina at full tilt boogie and then chops the throttles 100 yards short of the docks and lets his 3 foot stern wave bounce on through the entire marina at 20 mph! We should still be allowed to hang these "skippers" from the nearest yardarm.

6. The skipper who sees a busy channel or inlet as an obstacle course that must be run at the highest speed possible, with little or no worry about the trouble he is causing all the other boat traffic.

7. Speaking of busy channels and inlets, how come so many fishermen think that trolling in a navigation channel, with out riggers deployed, is a good idea? It's not only a bad idea, it's against the law!

8. Watching a boat zooming over the water with people sitting on the bow with their legs dangling over the side is a terrifying sight. One large wave will send them flying into the water in front of the boat. The boat will then run over them before the skipper can even think about stopping. The results of this stupidity are too horrible to even contemplate.

9. A skipper who allows his crew to stick out their arms and legs to help him "fend off" the dock he is approaching deserves the contempt of the entire marina. Boats and docks can be replaced; not so with human limbs.

10. Using the VHF marine radio for inane chit-chat is a sure sign that the skipper is a "greenhorn" or simply has never bothered to look at the F.C.C. rules governing the use of his radio. Cluttering up the radio waves with a bunch of nonsense is, someday, going to keep a boater with a real emergency from getting through.

Well, I could go on and on and really get you aggravated or, perhaps, just plain thinking I'm a crank. But remember, boating is a lot more fun if you and your crew put safety first and are considerate of your fellow boaters. Enjoy!

If you have a pet peeve you'd like to share, send it to me and maybe together we'll be able to enlighten some of our unaware boater friends about their aggravating actions on the water.

[Pipe_Dream]

Add this to the list (one of my pet peeves):

Worse than they guy who speeds through a No Wake zone is the guy who, upon seeing the NO WAKE sign, throttles back not to idle but just enough that instead of being up on plane now his bow is high in the air and he is plowing through the water, throwing the largest wake his boat is capable of. And this moron thinks he is being a good boat captain by "slowing down!!"

This past Sunday, leaving the marina, I saw a guy I know's boat tied up at the fuel dock (on the ICW) along with two other boats, and two county Deputies standing there talking. I wondered what was going on but had guests and didn't stop to ask (I don't like inserting myself into situations with The Law). A few hours later we returned to see the same boats still there and now there are two SCDNR officers there. I came to find out that while his boat was tied to the fuel dock, the other boat came by throwing an enormous wake that threw his boat into the dock causing some significant damage. The only way they were able to get the "captain" to turn around and take responsibility (amazingly he DID have his VHF on) was to call the Coast Guard. Then a second boat came in and while attempting to dock to get fuel, he hit one of the first boat's outboards! Impacted badly by two idiots, both doing damage, in the same day. >:(

[Monkey Butler]

Launching or captaining a boat presents all sorts of opportunities to make a fool out of yourself but some people seem to go out of their way to increase the odds.

On the way back to the ramp last Sunday afternoon we fell in behind what appeared to be a 60's era 14' MFG that looked like it had been painted with a broom. We were in a narrow part of the channel where it wasn't really appropriate to pass. There were two guys in the boat, the cap'n was driving and looking dead ahead. The mate was scrubbing the boat with what look like a back brush. Every so often the mate would tell the cap'n to slow down and he would dip what looked like the botom of an old tackle box over the side and wash off where he had just scrubbed. This happened around half a dozen times; coming to a near stop in the middle of the channel to get a few splashes of water with both the cap'n and mate oblivious to the line of boats behind them. When they got to the ramp they tied to the very end of the finger dock while they fetched the truck even though there was room for at least three boats in front of them so we had to idle around waiting for them to haul out.

When I was winching my boat on the trailer I took my shoes off mostly out of habit. It was a good ramp so I could hook the winch line to the bow by standing on the trailer while still holding onto the winch post. While I'm doing this some cowboy who had just launched his hotrod jet boat takes off like Don Garlits up the ramp. I said to myself "what a maroon" and went about my business.

You ever see a chase scene in the movies where the hero gets out of his car and jumps into a docked boat and speeds away. (BTW, I get a kick out of these scenes . I mean, come on, there is no way your going to stay one step ahead of your pursuers if you need to hop into a docked boat.) Anyway, this guy must have watched too many movies 'cause took he off out of there like 007.

So I'm ready to haul out and I stop to pick up my shoes which I left by the rear wheels of the truck and they are gone! I'm getting senile but I know I left them there so I holler over to my son and ask if he knows where my shoes are and he just shrugs. Even though there was nobody else waiting I didn't want to linger on the ramp so I start to pull out minus my shoes. My son starts calling for me to stop and when I do he grabs the boat hook and starts fishing around off the other side of the dock. Before I can figure out what he's doing he pops up with one of my shoes in his hand! When the cowboy had ripped his trailer out it created a wave that had washed my shoe into the drink. After a little more searching I found the other one on the ramp under my Suburban up near the front tires which were about 20' from the waterline! I hope Mr. Hotshot left his plug out.

As far as number 2 above; when I was a kid my father always taught me that leaving you fenders out was very unseamanlike and embarrassing so it is something I always double check but I think half the other boats I seen out Sunday were dragging them over the side...



I guess time change, kind of like if I ever walked around with my pants down and my underwear sticking out my dad would have clobbered me!

[bradford]

Is it a bad thing that I've considered shooting at these guys with my flare gun? ???

[Monkey Butler]

Originally Posted by Bradford

Is it a bad thing that I've considered shooting at these guys with my flare gun? * ???

Shooting a flare at 'em just for leaving their fenders out? Hardcore man, hardcore. ;)

[bradford]

Originally Posted by Monkey Butler

Shooting a flare at 'em just for leaving their fenders out? Hardcore man, hardcore. *;)

Maybe not the fender guys, but the plowing through a no wake zone should get a shot across the bow don't ya think?