[Hammerhead]

Students were assigned to read 2 books, "Titanic" and "My Life" by Bill
Clinton. One smart assed student turned in the following book report, with
the proposition that they were nearly identical stories! His professor gave
him an A+ for his report.

Titanic: $29.99
Clinton: $29.99

Titanic: Over 3 hours to read.
Clinton: Over 3 hours to read.

Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and subsequent
catastrophe.
Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent
catastrophe.

Titanic: Jack is a starving artist.
Clinton: Bill is a bullsh_t artist.

Titanic: In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.
Clinton: Ditto for Bill.

Titanic: During ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.
Clinton: Ditto for Monica.

Titanic: Jack teaches Rose to spit.
Clinton: Let's not go there.

Titanic: Rose gets to keep her ***elry.
Clinton: Monica's forced to return her gifts.

Titanic: Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life.
Clinton: Bill doesn't remember Jack sh_t.

Titanic: Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.
Clinton: Monica... hell lets not go there, either.

Titanic: Jack surrenders to an icy death.
Clinton: Bill goes home to Hilary.... basically the same thing