[CaptJ]

An elderly lady decided to give herself a big treat for her significant birthday by staying overnight in one of Chicago's most expensive hotels.

When she checked out next morning, the desk clerk handed her a bill for $500.00. She exploded and demanded to know why the charge was so high.

"It's a nice hotel but the rooms certainly aren't worth $500.00 for just an overnight stop without even breakfast."

The clerk told her that $500.00 is the 'standard rate' so she insisted on speaking to the Manager. The Manager appeared and forewarned by the desk clerk announced: "the hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference center which are available for use."

'But I didn't use them," she said.

''Well, they are here, and you could have," explained the Manager. He went on to explain that she could also have seen one of the in-hotel shows for which the hotel is famous. "We have the best entertainers from New York, Los Angeles, and Las Vegas performing here," the Manager said.

"But I didn't go to any of those shows," she said.

Well, we have them, and you could have," the Manager replied. No matter what amenity the Manager mentioned, she replied,

"But I didn't use it!"

The Manager was unmoved, so she decided to pay, wrote a check and gave it to the Manager. The Manager was surprised when he looked at the check. " But madam, this check is only made out for $100.00."

' 'That's correct. I charged you $400.00 for sleeping with me," she replied.

"But I didn't!" exclaims the very surprised Manager.

"Well, too bad, I was here, and you could have."

Don't mess with Senior Citizens!