Just when you think can't get worse
 

For those who don't know, my wife has been sick on and off for a few years. I came home one day last Aug. and her sugar was atover 800!! Called 911 and they took her to the hos. after that she went into rehab. She has been there ever since! Non healing wounds, sugar issues, phyic problems, and very very bad depression.
I go there every day, I feed her, go to doc appt. bring her coffees and stuff but she has not gotten any better, in some ways worse! Well after meeting with thw home and doc yesterday they said that she is never going to be coming home, which is what we have known for a long time, but not what I wanted to belive. So now I am making arrangements to bring some stuff to her and they are taking her SS, so money that was tight is REALLY REALLY going to be tight nowsince I had to beg for my SS of $750 a month is all I am going to 9have to run everything!!
I have applied for housing but that meamns I will lose the trailer now and live withj what next door now and its a 2 to 5 year waitting list.
So every one please pray for us we need it!!
:pray2::pray2:

Will do so very seriously.

Is the SS you are getting SSI? I don't know much about it but my wife is a therapist and she says she has had clients who REALLY didn't deserve to get it, but one of those lawyers who specialize in getting it for people got it for them anyway.

Lord knows you deserve whatever is allowed. If you are wondering at all, please post it here and I'll find out everything I can for you. I'm really tired of seeing lazy slobs get our tax dollars when good people like you get hosed.

I talked to my wife - it's disability, not SSI. Anyway, whichever or both, she says it's the kind of thing where you need to know the rules really well. That means an attorney who does that particular kind of work for a living. If you haven't checked into it, it's probably well worth looking into.

Any family you can move in with until things get squared away? At least you know your wife is in a place where her needs are being met. Wish I had better advice for you.

Social security os one of those things where you are better off to get an attorney to deal with, and just give them the 25%. I had to for mine after 2 1/2 years and one trip to court. Now I have my congressman involved because they have lost my backpay paperwork, and they could care less. My congressman has his own division just for handling social security problems for one county. How sad is that.

Thanks guys! I get my disabilty already, got easy as there was no dening it cause I was on dialysis already. The thig i was moning about is how little there giving me and allk the rules just to get it!
If worse comes to worse I can move in with my daughter and grandkids, but that a zoo!!!! I need to be able to hide and rest after dialysis. I did put in for housing but they say it can be uoto 6 years, but I get a doc note They can express me, but that is still upto 2 years.
I was just born the wrong color!! ( sorry that I offend anyone with that statement)

Ferm brings up a good point - don't hesitate to give your congressman or senator the opportunity to help a constituent. We have a quite liberal senator who really helped a friend when the bank was jerking him around with his mortgage. A liberal is more likely to help with this kind of thing - just don't tell them you'd never vote for them:zip:.

Hate to hear it MJ, wish I could tell you what to do.

Sorry about your Wife Joe, prayers sent for both of you

Just a thought..... Maybe you could take on a room mate and be able to keep the trailer?

Thought about a roomate, but its finding a good one?? I am having a hard time going thur the room as she is not dead, and I feel real bad thinking I am kicking her out before she is gone!

I hear ya buddy.....

It's by far not the same but Mom's been gone a year last week and I still can't stand to see anything of hers messed with.

Joe,
Karen and I are thinking of you.
So sorry to hear about your wife.

Wife was rushed to the Hos. today, not breathing well, infection, fluid on the lungs. She is ICU and they told me today she will be there for awhile??
:pray2::pray2::pray2::pray2:

Been thinking and praying for ya brother.

Sorry to hear MJ, our prayers from NC for you, your wife and whole family.

Joe.. more thoughts and prayers for you and family from N.C.

the same, from SC

Really stinks. Thoughts and prayers

sorry to hear, old man. hope everything starts to look up for you. golden years aint so golden.

Joe, many many many prayers sent for both your wife and you. Hope things do a turn about for the better. God bless man.

Just to update, I have not said much But we have started to make arrangements and calling Hospice back in. She has been move 5 time now back and fourth from the nursing home to the hosp. She is in Hossp now. They have made me the health care proxy as she is not with it. She is so thin and friel that they say if the have to try they are going to hurt her,So I have put the DNR in order today.
She was raching out today, I asked what you reaching for? she says the door, why?? "I am going out" were? I am going with my sister Karen ( she died the week before xmas) as I sat in tears I said its ok to go! She said open the door for me, I said you have to do it your self. She tryed for about 20 min then stopped.
So if I disappear for a bit you will know why, my kids (my son mostly) are taking it very hard!!!! He wants her to stay long enough to see his new son which is due in 2 weeks, Have no idea if its going to happen?? Ok I am :cry::cry::cry: Talk to you soon

Joe, I went thru the same thing with my first wife 35+ years ago. (She died of lung cancer) There is nothing I can say except that you have to accept that it's a blessing for them to walk thru that door. Their pain and suffering stops, and really, when all is said and done, isn't that what we wish for our loved ones? That they aren't suffering anymore? That their pain is gone? I know your heartfelt pain only too well, and about the only thing I can say is that it will diminish a little over time. It never really goes completely away, but it will get better. Time is a wonderful healer of both the mind and the heart. I pray for you and I pray for her that you will overcome this tragic event. You are both in my daily prayers. God bless you both. :pray:

Thinking of you and your wife MJ!!!!!!!!!! Stay strong

beautifully said

MJ... I'm so sorry for your pain and hers

i went through this with my parents, both did the "reaching" for loved ones. it was comforting to me because it told me they did not want to be here anymore and wanted to see what was next.

the passing of parents is a natural order, losing a spouse or child is a lot tougher, destroyer's right, once you see she is not suffering, it will help.

do what you can while you can,

MJ-
Please know we here in Ohio are thinking of you and praying for you. I'll light a candle for you all at mass in the morning.
God bless,
Ed

They called 8:30 AM to say she has become septic, not breathing well, she is on drugs to keep the blood perssure up,, and on the resperator. Doc says they are doing all they can, wait 24 hour to see if she turns around if not thats it. I am now her health care proxy and put the DNR in place. This is what I was trying to avoid just wanted her to go, not left up to us to pull the plug! We will see what tomorrow brings.

Thanks All for all the prays and thoughts!! It means alot!!

Joe
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I feel the reaching is a good thing. Means someone familiar is there to help her across. I lost my Dad unexpectedly. Got a phone call at 7:16 am from a cousin I hadn't spoken to in years. The only good thing is you have a chance to say goodbye, but I'm know it's got to be hell watching her slowly get there. Try and stay strong for your kids, but you'll need to grieve too, do what feels right.

We're here for you.

Ok today was a hell of a day!! As a family my kids have broken down and emoations ran wild! Things were said that should have never been said, But in the end we all hugged and went are way.
Doc came in and said that the seatives have been off since yesterday, she is still hooked up to the machines but they are turned off, and she is maintaing her B/P, and breating on her own! But she will not wake up?? and she needs to be awake to pull the tube so she can cough all the crap out. Tomorrow will be 72 hours and she should be awake? they say they see this in mostly older people but she is young. Might be all the brain damage from all the low blood sugars??But the tube will come out tomorrow and if all goes well great! If not the we go into comfort mode which is a morphine drip, and then she won't feel anything and will go to sleep and the pass in her sleep.
So there is another hard day coming tomorrow!! after missing dialysis I have to go tomorrow, even her doctor yelled at me for not going yesterday. So I will go and then drive there so they can do wht needs to be done, my daughter will come down and get me in a wheelchair cause I dont feel well after my treatment never mind mussing a day then going I am sure 8I will be wiped.

Thank You all for your thoughts and prays!!!!!!!!!!!Please contuniue!!
Joe


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Thoughts and wishes sent to you and your family

Thoughts and Prayers...

Continuing prayers from my family. One of the guys said "do what you can, while you can" and you're a real inspiration the way you're doing that in spite of your own health issues. You'll never be sorry for hanging in there - you're giving her a great gift being there for her.

Today was a bad day!! she has stoped responding and the doc ays her brain is gone! So its just keep her comfortable now, they have stoped all meds and she is just getting morphine now, her heart rate with the mjorphine is at 130 breaths at 6 per min, and o2 is at 81, they say it will be 24 hours to a week but she is going for sure! Her body is tired and so is she. Had my sister inlaw and 2 old friends come up today and we talked to her and prayed toghter over her whiloe holding hands. Its tuff, but I am ok as saturday when I was there she wanted a hug and then a bigger one, I said I loved her and she said the same to me, then on sunday she weny on the ventlator. So i was to say I loved her before she went and she new it as well as her saying it to me. That means so much to me right now!!!!!!!!! I love you Margaret and will miss you!!

I so sorry Joe but thankful for you both getting to express your love to each other.
That is a priceless experience that will always stay with you.

hey did the Morphine drip on my mother as well. Speaking for past experience I can tell you that it's completely painless to the person, they simply go to sleep... no pain, no suffering. I'm so sorry Joe. If there's anything I or we can do please tell us. God bless you both.