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View Full Version : Does anyone speak "American" anymore?


Stinky_Hooker
08-27-2007, 05:37 PM
In order to continue getting-by in America (our home land), we all need to learn the NEW English language! Practice by reading the following conversation until you are able to understand the term "TENJOOBERRYMUDS". With a little patience, you'll be able to fit right in with the growing trend!!!

Now, here goes...


The following is a telephone exchange between a hotel guest and room-service:

Room Service (RS): "Morrin. Roon sirbees."

Guest (G): "Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service."

RS: " Rye . Roon sirbees...morrin! Joowish to oddor sunteen???"

G: "Uh..... Yes, I'd like to order bacon and eggs."

RS: "Ow July den?"

G: ".....What??"

RS: "Ow July den?!?... pryed, boyud, poochd?"

G: "Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry... scrambled, please."

RS: "Ow July dee baykem? Crease?"

G: "Crisp will be fine."

RS: "Hokay. An Sahn toes?"

G: "What?"

RS: "An toes. July Sahn toes?"

G: "I... don't think so"

RS: "No? Judo wan sahn toes???"

G: "I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo wan sahn toes' means."

RS: "Toes! Toes!...Why Joo don Juan toes? Ow bow Anglish moppin we bodder?"

G: "Oh, English muffin!!! I've got it! You were saying 'toast'... Fine...Yes, an English muffin will be fine."

RS: "We bodder?"

G: "No, just put the bodder on the side."

RS: "Wad?!?"

G: "I mean butter... just put the butter on the side."

RS: "Copy?"

G: "Excuse me?"

RS: "Copy...tea...meel?"

G: "Yes. Coffee, please... and that's everything."

RS: "One Minnie. Scramah egg, crease baykem, Anglish moppin, we bodder on sigh and copy.. rye??"

G: "Whatever you say."

RS: "Tenjooberrymuds."

G: "You're welcome."

tsubaki
08-27-2007, 06:37 PM
Stink,I'm way ahead. Round here there several dialects. A few being; Geechee, Gullah, Daufuskie,Beaufort, the plain ole kuntry twist on any of these and lets not forget the social speach pattern that can be distinguished as either Augusta or Macon.
I unknowingly amazed one fellow (african american) worker by carring on a conversation with another (african american). When it was over the other guy asked, "how in the hell could you understand him,
I'm black and couldn't pick out three words he said"?
I just said "he's either from Beaufort or Daufuskie, that's the way they talk".
He went up to the guy, asked him where he was from and the responce was "just outside Beaufort".

bradford
08-27-2007, 11:27 PM
How can he be from just outside of Beaufort if he's an AFRICAN AMERICAN? * ??? * ;) ;)

reelapeelin
08-28-2007, 12:39 AM
Ola!!...Me penga es muy grande!! ;D ;D ...

tsubaki
08-28-2007, 08:01 AM
;D I was trying (against my normal judgement) to be "politically correct".
It won't happen again!

reel ? hit your head or split your lip on a beer bottle? ;D

reelapeelin
08-28-2007, 09:11 AM
reel ? hit your head or split your lip on a beer bottle? ;D




Hit my head ::) ... musta been pretty SOLID contact ;D ;D ;D ...

reelapeelin
08-28-2007, 09:22 AM
Stinky...I went back thru yer 1st post on this thread and have concluded it'd be infinately easier and much more productive to get in the truck and go to the nearest Waffle House 8) ...

The other day, I got a Customer Service rep in Pakistan...tried for a little while, but eventually asked for American Customer Service...was immediately switched state-side and concluded my business...if everybody starts makin' this request, maybe they'll get the hint ::) ...

bradford
08-28-2007, 04:27 PM
;D I was trying (against my normal judgement) to be "politically correct".
It won't happen again!
You've been warned!! ;D ;D ;D

Seriously though if I were politically correct I would be an English/Irish/Swedish/Cherokee American, kinda too long to say or write. And I want my reparations for my great great great grandparents having to live in a one room "house" with a dirt floor and bust their a$$ to have their descendants move up the food chain from nothing! Ya'll think the good reverend jackson or aclu might be interested in helping me? ;) ;)

tsubaki
08-28-2007, 04:45 PM
Sorry none of those titles are allowed to fit to you.
Look in the mirror, automatic disqualification.

Stinky_Hooker
08-28-2007, 05:00 PM
I agree RAP. Much easier.