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View Full Version : Redneck understanding of words


garagenc
08-18-2010, 05:54 PM
Two Rednecks, Larry and Doug, are sitting at their favorite bar, drinking beer~

Larry turns to Doug and says, 'You know, I'm tired of going through life without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the Community College and sign up for some classes.'

Doug thinks it's a good idea and the two leave.

The next day, Larry goes down to the college and meets Dean of Admissions, who signs him up for the four basic classes:

Math, English, history, and Logic.

'Logic?' Larry says. 'What's that?'

The dean says, 'I'll give you an example.Do you own a weed eater?'

'Yeah.'

'Then logically speaking, because you own a weed eater, I think that you would have a yard.'

'That's true,I do have a yard.'

'I'm not done, 'the dean says.'Because you have a yard, I think logically that you would have a house.'

'Yes, I do have a house.'

'And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a family.'

'Yes, I have a family.

'I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must have a wife. And because you have a wife, then logic tells me you must be a heterosexual.'

'I am a heterosexual. That's amazing, you were able to find out all of that because I have a weed eater.'

Excited to take the class now, Larry shakes the Dean's hand and leaves to go meet Doug at the bar. He tells Doug about his classes, how he is signed up for Math, English, History, and Logic.

'Logic? 'Doug says, 'What's that?'

Larry says, 'I'll give you an example. Do you have a weed eater?'

'No.'

'Then you're a queer.'

bradford
08-18-2010, 06:20 PM
I have 2.

nipper
08-19-2010, 08:16 AM
I have several, but only one runs right now. Wonder what that means.

RidgeRunner
08-19-2010, 10:54 AM
I have one too but I always keep the hedge trimmer attachment hooked up. What does it all mean?

RidgeRunner
08-20-2010, 01:16 PM
Man U Guys Sleepin or What?

Hetero that likes the bushes trimmed... Da dum Dum!:sun:

nipper
08-20-2010, 06:34 PM
Good one Ridge. You are right, it was set up perfectly and we all missed it!

lumberslinger178
08-20-2010, 08:17 PM
:you::you::you::you::you:

RWilson2526
08-20-2010, 08:28 PM
yup tossed as soft ball right at us and missed it!!